Give Me What I Want

Then James and John, the sons of Zebedee, came to Jesus and said to him, “Teacher, we want you to do for us whatever we ask of you.” Matthew 10:35

When you hear that, do you think like me? Seriously, that takes some gumption to walk up to Jesus and basically say, “Give me what I want.” That’s some bold talk for a couple of fishermen. I’ve always thought that it was a bit presumptuous to demand from the Savior that He do what ever they ask of Him. But this week, as we traveled through Mark 10 and 11, I was struck by Jesus’s response.

“What do you want me to do for you?

Not, “Excuse me? What did you just say?”

Not, “Really? You want Me to do what YOU say I should do? Really?” ‘

Not, “Oh, so I work for you now, huh? You ask and I jump? Is that how this relationship works now?”

Just a simple clarification from them on what exactly it is they wish. He’s making them think. He doesn’t say he will do it. He makes them verbalize their desire. I mean we are all aware that He already knows what they’re going to say. He is God, right?

And their response is interesting to me. We want to be your two top dogs. I’ve always heard that as a power grab.

But, what if their request comes from somewhere deeper and they might not even be aware? What if their desire to be the two disciples closest to Him isn’t about the fame, but about the idea that they want to be the best servants they can be FOR HIM. That’s a whole new take for me. Why do I think this?

Two reasons.

One, at daily Mass Wednesday, our priest mentioned that it is okay to ask for greatness in serving God. That striving to be the best follower of Christ is worth praying for. Yea, I can see that. I’d like to think they may have been thinking that way.

Two, brings me back again, to His response to these two followers. He tells them that they don’t really know what they are asking and He takes a moment to clarify it for them. “Hey guys, can you really stick it out and do just what I do? You got what it takes?” (paraphrased, of course) When they boldly say yes, He tells them, it’s on. They will be imitators of Him, but he doesn’t promise the ability to sit in any special chairs. His answer to their request is, “Yes, but on my terms.” (again, paraphrased) Mark 10:38-40

So, that’s rolling around in my head and my heart and then I get to the next section in Mark 10 and here comes blind Bartimaeus.

Can I just take a minute and say that I love how the Church provides continuity with the Daily Mass readings that help us keep the story connections in front of us and bring the context into clearer focus? What a gift.

As I read this passage (Mark 10:46-52), I see a man boldly calling out to Jesus. Someone who has been begging for years is now crying out when he hears who it is that is passing by. What made him speak out in a different way to Jesus? How does his bold talk, “Jesus, Son of David, have pity on me.” compare with James and John? He had no problem brining his need to the Lord. Even when others were trying to silence him, he spoke out all the more.

And Jesus responds to Bartimaeus in the same way. A simple, “What do you want me to do for you?” My mind literally clicked as I realized that Jesus had just said that same thing. I don’t believe that was an accident. God doesn’t work that way. So, what does that mean for me? Why are there two instances back to back in Scripture where someone is speaking boldly to the Lord and He turns to them with those simple words?

What do you want me to do for you? If that is His response, it means He can handle my big request. He’s not offended by me coming to Him and expressing my desire for Him to do what I’m asking Him to do.

Save my marriage.

Bring my child back.

Take this suffering away.

Ease my loneliness.

Find me a job.

Help my parent remember who I am.

Take away this addiction.

It doesn’t matter what it is that seems too big for the Lord to answer, go ahead. Be bold and tell Him that you want Him to give you what you want. Be unafraid to pester Him. I think He literally told us about a persistent widow, so technically, it’s His idea. (Luke 18:1-8)

But, remember. When you ask, you may not find His answer to be quite what you expected. James and John didn’t. But it ended up being better than what they had wanted, in the long run. Bartimaeus wanted to see. And he did, but his life was never the same again, because He followed Jesus after that and his line of vision became that of the Lord. If you are walking the same way as the Lord, you will see what He sees.

Mark 11 brings a lesson from the Lord and a fig tree. When His followers are confused by it all, He reminds them that if they have faith, they can move mountains. Hmmm… so, faith can do big things. Bold requests made with faith can do amazing things.

One last example of someone speaking boldly to Jesus. John 2. Here comes His mom and with a look and four words, “They have no wine.” I mean, that’s not even an actual request. It’s a statement of fact. But every mom and child knows that the words, “Your room is a mess.” or “The kitchen sink is full of dishes.” are actually requests to get something done. Mary had faith in Him. She would learn over time that her request had consequences that she might not have imagined at the time. But, just like James and John and Bartimaeus, the end result was just as it should have been.

So, as I think about Him looking at me and asking this question, “What do you want me to do for you?” I’m going to answer with these words, “Abba Father. My sweet Jesus. My list is long. I want so much. And, I’m going to go out on this limb that you’ve invited me on with faith and trust. I’m going to ask you do this amazing thing and that wonderous miracle and I’m going to trust that you want to do it. But, I’m also okay with the fact that it may look a bit different than I expect. It may involve more suffering. It may mean I have to change my direction and see what you see. I can rest in that. You know best.”

XOXO,

Barb